Chapter 15

15

As the sun begins to bear down on me, I start to wake, slowly raising myself up onto my elbows. The ghosts from the night before still linger in my mind like the mucus that has dried into the corners of my eyes. I wipe them both away and exhale a cough from my lungs.

The cough echoes throughout the park, startling me into self-awareness. There are no other sounds except the reverberation of my hack against the trees. I can hear no passing vehicles or whistles from a nesting bird. I am alone and this eerie silence gives me the feeling of being in a morgue.

My bowels are moving, and this awkward position I'm sitting in is putting undue pressure upon my bladder. I stand from the park bench and head towards the nearest tree to relieve myself. My piss smells strongly, although I've had nothing to drink.

The mystery of my arrival here, pissing on this tree, crawls out from the back of my skull and imbeds itself into the left side of my brain. I wince as it begins to throb.

I'd like some breakfast.

Eggs, bacon, maybe ten or so cups of coffee. Cream, sugar...my spoon moving in a clockwise motion, creating a whirlpool of bittersweet. A middle-aged waitress brings these things to me and I smile faintly before looking back down at today's crossword.

12-Across is fucking with me. What is an eight-letter word for and upholstered chair insert?

Or better yet, what is a sixteen-letter word for a man pissing on his shoe?

I look down and notice the answer is me.